Thursday, November 24, 2011

To Occupiers Of Wall Street: Black Friday, Poetic Justice?

Poetic Justice?
Occupy Wall Street, How Do You 
Like Your 99%er's Now?  

Some of you have read my previous rants about Black Friday.  And to any of you readers who may actually participate in this travesty of consumer greed and selfishness, shame again on you!  

After Thanksgiving lunch today, the sun was out and the weather quite nice.  While on a short errand to pick up dessert for work tomorrow, I passed a nearby shopping center.  Sure enough, there were a number of the recently designated 99%er's lined up, waiting for the stores to open at midnight.  This was at 2:45 in the afternoon, mind you.  

These folks had tents set up, a pick-up truck with a generator with heavy duty extension cords that powered industrial heaters aimed at the tents and others in the line.  This must mean that these mindless s**theads had been there at least since Wednesday night after the store closed.  

It occurred to me that these people were Occupiers of a different sort.  They must represent that mythical 99% of the population that has been oppressed, according to the OWS crowd, by these evil, bloodsucking corporations.  Yet, there they are, sleeping in tents, cold and inconvenienced BY CHOICE, in front of one of Wall Street's darlings, waiting to trample each other for Samsung flatscreen TV's, Dyson Animal vacuum cleaners, Kodak cameras,  and Sony DVD's.  

The stores that these Black Friday insainiacs are occupying- Walmart, Target, Kohls, Macy's, and Sears, just to name a few, collectively employ some 2.86 million 99%er's.  And I didn't even bother to research the number of employees on the payrolls of the companies that manufacture all the gidgets, gadgets, and iWads that these idiots are waiting to snag.  

Point is, there are corrupt corporations, to be sure, but the livelihoods of all of us who are gainfully employed depend on corporations.  While I heatedly disagree with the concept of Black Friday, it is a free country. Of sorts.  But these ragtag hippymuffin wannabe's who are creating numerous stinks (literally) in parks that are privately owned, or tax payer funded need to put up or shut up.  State your case cogently and pointedly.  Then clean up your messes, go home, take a shower, and get jobs to pay off your damned student loans, or upgrade to a faster smartphone ( made by these scum-sucking companies you're protesting) that will keep you all connected for your next gathering.  

Better still, just go away.  The tax paying 99% (I would love to know how that number was calculated) are tired of paying for your slovenly camping trips that really only inconvenience everyone, and NOT BY CHOICE. 

When I become king, Thanksgiving will be a four day holiday.  No stores.  No idiotic shopping.  No trampling people to death for stuff.  No door busters.  No madness.  Just a time for, well, Thanks Giving. 

For that, I would be thankful. 

Rick Baker 
November 24, 2011 
Rochester, NY  

Suggested previous essays on Black Friday: 


  1. its already grey thursday...the sales have been going on since 9 am this morning....that way if you had turkey for breakfast you could get in i am not in line...

  2. oh and happy thanksgiving...smiles.

  3. Bravo! Well spoken Sir Richard...
    I have yet to find a statement from anyone affiliated with OWS that really sums up all the rhetoric and mumbo jumbo that passes (by most) for intelligence.

  4. I must have struck a bit of luck...coming home across Chicago streets, I was struck by how quiet they were....maybe I went through a time warp

  5. You have hit both nails directly on the head.

    word verification: bucket — what the occupiers and BF shoppers deserve, filled, of course, but to actually wish them that would be nasty

  6. I love the people that camp out to get a video game to that they can "camp out" in their basements.

  7. Though we don't have it here, Happy Thanksgiving Rick.

  8. you make some great points about the insanity of consumerism

  9. Retail therapy -- shopping as a blood sport/endurance event... nah, I just don't get it. I haven't been to a mall in about twenty years.